"I do wonder, Mr. Wolf," she said sweetly,

"If you'd know when a bathroom was clean," she went over and peered in his wastebasket, "or when a wastebasket was empty," she said. "A book feels true when it feels true," she said to him, impatiently. pp 325

"Tolerance of the intolerance is a difficult task that the times ask of us..." pp 386

"...don't worry - so what if there is no life after death? There is life after Garp, believe me. Even if there is only death after death (after death), be grateful for small favors - sometimes there is birth after sex, for example." pp 413

"Life," Garp wrote, "is sadly not structured like a good old-fashioned novel. Instead an end occurs when those who are meant to peter out have petered out. All that is left is memory. But even a nihilist has memory." pp 418

"Your father was a difficult fellow; he never gave an inch - but that's the point: he was always following his nose; whenever it took him, it was always his nose." pp 424

"But in the world according to Garp, we are all terminal cases." pp 437

-The World According to Garp, John Irving
A Henry Robbins Book
EP Dutton, New York
1978
---
These were some of the quotes that struck me. I finally finished the novel today. I feel like I gained and lost something at the same time.

"a life lived in fear is a life half-lived."

-in the bathroom of asian pub, cooper square

there is something about passing a moment with a beautiful stranger that even makes waiting for a bus an hour late worth it. i bumped into mike on the line to ny port authority at 10 am but the bus did not appear until 11 am. we met someone new who had a connection to both mike and me. we will probably never meet again, but it was a lovely fleeting moment. there were so many times we were prematurely relieved that buses arrived, but they were heading to points north, west and south... to newark, lakewood and atlantic city. finally, one did come to take us to our destination. once we boarded, i nestled into my seat and continued reading the world according to garp. i winced; i gasped; i laughed.

we were stuck in traffic for three hours and arriving in nypa at 2 pm, i rushed down to 2nd ave and 7th street on the r train to meet savita at may's place. it was so funny, we both kicked our boots off when we sat down and used up many napkins to dry whatever we could. i ordered the lunch special consisting of a ginger salad, a tuna roll, a salmon roll and a bowl of udon. savita ordered the salmon teriyaki bento box. after an hour or so later of some good qt, we wandered around to starbucks for coffee/pumpkin bread and various other stores for gifts. we tried to get into bobst with no success. we found ourselves in a building with computers where savita could charge her phone because of a nice and unnamed security guard. it still would not turn on so we brought it to the verizon store where we discovered her battery was dead; she bought a new one for $70!!! we eventually ended up at asian pub. our freshman year hangout is closing in a month!! so following tradition, we ordered some lychee-tinis and snacked on chips and salsa while chatting. we lured emily from her apartment to join us. we later went to phebe's on bowery and e 4th for magic hat #9 and emily's soup - the baguette was so good. at 10:40 pm, emily went home and savita and i slipped and slid down 4th street to get to the ace subway line to go back to nj.

i love that when we get together, we can talk about ANYTHING. and that i can tell them what i feel i can't tell anyone else. they divulge me for the time i need and understand. i  adore that savita can tell me i was acting stupid when i overreacted to internet correspondence because i misinterpreted it. i have to admit i prefer face to face communication with eye contact and knowing the tone of someone's voice.

getting ready for my winter hibernation.

christmas eve was lovely. i had gone for a run, the first in a long time, and then my parents and i went to atlantic city. i met up with my grandma, aunt mary and uncle wah at a chinese place. aunt julie and jess had already eaten so they placed our reservation and ordered the food so it would be ready when we got there. there was crab fried rice, lobster, eggplant, collard greens, steamed fish, and fruit for dessert. i went up to our room in caesar's and went straight to bed. my mom went to walk around and gamble and came in later. i woke up after 7 hours and ordered breakfast! two eggs over easy with toast and potatoes. my dad and mom got the western omelet with toast and potatoes. then we bummed around as my dad watched chinese tv and i read. around lunchtime, we went to the vietnamese place off north carolina ave with aunt mary, uncle wah, jess, aunt julie, and grandma. i got bun with shrimp on sugar cane (so perfect with fish sauce) with vietnamese coffee (so syrupy and sweet! i didn't like it). then my parents and i went home to go to aunt samantha's house for her dinner. it was a nonstop foodfest with mashed sweet potatoes, sushi, pistachio cake, fruit and yogurt tarts, lobster curry, dumplings, (and other stuff i couldn't eat) all while i sipped on red wine. while digesting, savita called and we chatted about a possible nyc meet up tuesday :)

on our way home, my dad was imparting his wisdom. he was telling me about life in the real world and how i can be super educated but still not know anything. it was interesting to listen to him talk about different types of people out there. i feel like i've met many of them though, but i let him go on. one highlight: when you ask questions or ask for help, you will either get a response or you won't. out of the people who won't respond, they either don't know or know and don't want to help you because of competition or jealousy. my dad told me not to be in the latter group if i can help it. it just causes unnecessary stress to an unfulfilling life. so wiseeee, i wish he had a beard to look the part.

with a splash of milk and a hint of cinnamon

today my mom and i went to starbucks. i got my tall cup of christmas blend; i ordered her a tall peppermint mocha. as she paid for it, she dropped her money into the fridge with the sandwiches on display. dave probably got his basketball skills from her because the fall was so precise it slipped through the fan grate. i could see a lot of icky stuff in there, but i simply could not retrieve it. the poor high school cashier tried to clear the whole shelf but couldn't get to it. he brought out a vacuum but couldn't suck it out. the best part was that both the workers and the other customers were super patient. eventually i just paid for it and pleaded with my mother to forget about the $20. she was appalled at my suggestion. then as i waited for my credit card, the other starbucks worker handed me the missing money. i don't know how she got to it, but it almost made the 15 minutes of awkwardness worth it. almost.

my mom was smitten, especially since she got her money back AND got me to pay for her drink haha.

"And I was like

baby baby baby ooh
like baby baby baby noo
like baby baby baby ooh
i thought you'd always be mine."
-justin bieber

nikhil and i met up yesterday after i came back from the gym. we walked to canal street and i made an exception. i had an egg custard tart and pork bun from chinatown, which is the best in the world in my opinion (so much better than the ones in sf, la or boston - no offense). he had to go grade biochem finals so i walked through soho window shopping at uniqlo and urban outfitters. i went to trader joe's to buy anjali a coffee cake for her belated birthday and who should call but MEERA who was ALSO around union square.

meera and i chatted about dartmouth and penn as we walked to 15th and 8th ave where we saw anjali across the street!! we walked to chelsea market to meet emily, looking sophisticated and business casual! after everyone else got their sandwiches, we found ourselves a bench like homeless people, per usual. then a table became available so we moved. near there, i awkwardly asked a stoic man to take our picture; he unhappily did so.

with meera's suitcase that was bigger than her whole body, we hopped in a cab to stout where evan met up with us. i had hard cider, which had that sweet and bubbly i was looking for. then at 3:50 pm, i RAN to port authority to go home. i usually sleep during the whole ride, but i woke up in time to watch the orange sky turn dark. so pretty. SAFE TRAVELS MEERA, i miss you already.

today i woke up and went to the mall with my mom. i bought some stuff and then went to shop rite with jena while blasting j biebs (against my will - mostly) during the car ride. we got some eggs and pecans to make pecan pie bars. they turned out gooey and sweet and buttery in all the right ways. we watched peter pan, the non-animated version from 2004, and i think it changed my life. so cute i can't even put it in words. then we watched britney spears videos that were playing for the whole day haha while looking through our middle school yearbook. now i'm happily reading the world according to garp (i stopped quoting the book because it got a little intense. i highly recommend it though, it's a page turner).

"Late night, brakes lock, hear the tires squeal

Red light, can't stop so I spin the wheel
My world goes black before I feel an angel steal me from the
Greedy jaws of death and chance, and pull me in with steady hands
They've given me a second chance, the artist in the ambulance"
-Thrice

sunday night, after jess finished studying, we walked to ave a and 7th street a restaurant named 7a. we ordered a pitcher of sangria and split a quesadilla with guacamole and refried beans and a basket of fries. although it was gluttony to the extreme at midnight, it was worth it. monday i met up with michele at cosi for lunch. i had the apple granola salad with SO MUCH BREAD. the flatbread from that place is bomb. then i met up with jess again, edited her final paper and went to the gym. i don't care for the new machines at cole's... they are trying too hard to be advanced: precor > matrix. then jess and i reconvened to meet kenny at brick lane curry house on e 6th street and 2nd ave. we had some cauliflower fritters, fried onions and our own dishes. i had the vegetables in madras curry with some merlot. so good. then i went to into the subway and got out at the 110 and cathedral stop off the c. i went to rachel, kathryn and christina's apt to hang out. their andes mint brownies were so addictive and deliciously decadent. we watched one tree hill on dvd and chatted about whatever came to mind. we went to bed around midnight and i woke up to a cute note from the working girls.

i got ready to go to union square and met up with dan at whole foods. he got a sandwich and yogurt parfait as we sat and talked about the usual stuff. good luck on your surgery; i am so stoked i know what it is due to my anatomy class. then i went to pie on 4th ave and 13th street to visit liz. she gave me a sample slice of pizza as we talked about our breaks and what we have been doing. after that i met up with neil and krunal at bar none. neil bought me a blue moon and we talked about med school and non med school before they started playing beer pong at the bar. krunal had to go, so neil and i went to mamoun's on st. marks and then to pomme frites.  you can't go wrong with pomegranate teriyaki mayo. we walked around washington square park to see the lit christmas tree there. then i went back to emily's to watch she's the man. that movie was ridiculous in all the right ways.

now i have to get my life together before going to chelsea market for lunch with emily, meera and anjali. i need to go to union square to find the dead drop usb sticks that chris mentioned...

"I told you to be patient

I told you to be fine
I told you to be balanced
I told you to be kind
Now all your love is wasted?
Then who the hell was I?"
-bon iver

yesterday, amit and i got into the city at 2 pm and had mamoun's on macdougal street for lunch. it is such a good falafel for so cheap ($2.50!). i went to bobst and took a nap while charging my ipod. then i met up with emily in midtown. we went to ise on 56th street for japanese food with her dad. i had the soba with bean curd, it was delicious. we shared the lobster tempura and had some kirin to wash it down. after watching mindless television in her dad's hotel room (while eating dark chocolate and assorted nuts), we went back to her apartment. we contemplated going to 107th street for a holiday party, but we were both pooped; traveling 40 minutes didn't seem reasonable when there was a bed so close. we fell asleep watching i love you, man in emily's bed.

this morning, i woke up after 8 hours of restful sleep. we went to george's for brunch. we both had eggs (mine were over easy) with toast and potatoes. we set up her new ipad in her room and laid around listening to bon iver and being emo. then we went shopping, split a wafle and dinges extravaganza, and walked around the city while chatting it up. emily also pierced her cartilage while i held her hand haha. i met up with jess in stuy town with a snowball pastry from blackhound in hand. so delicious. i had some graham crackers with chocolate and peanut butter - it was pretty perfect. at 6, i went to makita to meet up with rachel and christina for japanese food. we split a plate of vegetable gyoza and i had a yellowtail roll. i'm so content. now i'm with jess again eating more peanut butter as she types out her final paper. i kinda miss college sometimes...

fireside chats in norwich

time lapse of la: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrGcd6PN7EE

dinner at molly's was amazing. for edmund's birthday, chris, ashley, dan, nick, robert, kenoma, ken, yike, alex, jocelyn, jonathon, erin and i ate and were merry. you also can't go wrong with $2 margaritas. i had a spicy black bean burger with fries per usual. so good. then chris, ashley and i hopped into his car to go to nicole's house in norwich. we chilled out with the people there, including nicole, julia, devang, mike, carrie, kirsten, whitney, nick, ryan, ben, liz, tessa, and lauren, and talked about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. at one point whitney, nick and i conversed about how to ski (pizza pies and french fries) and to brew beer (as well as other top secret ideas, pending pre-patents) in front of the fireplace, which was amazing. i will start said beginner skiing and beer brewing next month when we all come back. it's only going to be two weeks, but i think i have minor separation anxiety already...

tessa's peanut butter cookies with the kisses were amazing. you also can't go wrong with chips and salsa over fireside chatter. i tried the lemon flavor of four lokos, it was pretty gross. a little after midnight, we said our good-byes and nick picked me up in a hug! that makes me happy and reminds me that although i am not the skinniest one in my family, i'm not quite chubby yet. i hope.

now i'm heading to bed before going on the road with amit to manhattan. happy holidays.

energy, anergy, apathy.

quiz one done. thank goodness... i didn't feel prepared but i'm glad it is over!

this morning i woke up at 6:30 to look over some radiology (anterior collateral ligament on the test!) before heading over to the exam room. it was awesome that chris, julia and ryan bought us muffins and hot chocolate and coffee for the test. thanks guys! with my blueberry muffin and coffee in hand, i sat next to jon and in front of marianne. i looked down and realized that my ankle was bleeding due to the newness of my sneakers. i was then told about moleskin bandages. i'll have to look into that.

i took the anatomy, biochemistry, immunology, and physiology tests thinking they were pretty fair but still guessing at a few. i loved seeing the question about the posterior tibial artery because david and i had taken off our shoes and socks to find it the other night. haha or the one about the function of the popliteus muscle (it laterally rotates your knee to unlock it) when quynh, dan and i talked about it in class. or dr. j. lyons telling us to remember the cutaneous innervation of the deep fibular artery (between the big and second toes) and having it show up on the test. or dr. swenson's table conference question about anastamosis on the test (it wasn't the obturator artery!). studying in groups is definitely more awesome than flying solo (i miss our biochem study sessions, savita!). then i went to the student lounge to give mariam her finals present where i got to hang out with yike and mike while waiting for our friends to finish their tests. the ski video (with its awesome soundtrack, haha including the emo song, jess) we watched was so artfully done, kinda inspires me to go skiing if i can manage to stay standing. jocelyn and i then walked lou's for menaka's birthday brunch! i was still full from my muffin so i nibbled at jocelyn's potatoes, brooke's eggs and katia's frappe as they offered... i need to learn about resistance. i went to the gym and worked out for today and my missed day from wednesday. i walked home and cleaned my bathroom.

i always appreciate it when people put the seat down.

then i watched grey's anatomy and 30 rock after unsuccessfully attempting to nap. now i'm off to molly's! mmm, the bread there is bomb. can't wait until tomorrow when amit and i drive back to nyc to hang out with emily, rachel, kathryn! and then spending time with jess, nikhil doing whatever before wednesday lunch with meera, anjali and emily!! immediately after, i'll be going home. HOME. i'm so excited.

Happy Birthday Edmund!

As I get through this week, I am nostalgic for the things I miss from New York.

-themed potlucks (and cooking on a gas stove)
-having a gym in my apartment building
-street vendors with their crazy jewelry and scarves
-ice skating in Bryant Park
-the holiday windows displays at the big department stores
-the type of guy who wears skinny ties with his jeans and converse
-people watching
-reading in parks
-getting beyond the small talk
-leaving work at work when I go home for the day
-going out and dressing up wearing heels!
-just catching the subway train as you swipe in
-when people tell you they're leaving and say bye
-Max Brenner's and Trader Joe's
-taking a walk with someone without any destination in mind

Dove chocolate: Your smile is your best accessory.

Happy Birthday Menaka!

I woke up feeling like I stepped into a scene of the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe. Outside was beautiful, but I was seriously contemplating skipping class. However, Sir Lyons was scheduled to lecture about the anterior leg, and how could I resist?

HAE was good, minus Bijan. I love the ability to hold something concretely and understand how it originates, inserts and works a motion. I really enjoyed working with Quynh and Dan; we have a good flow to our group. Anatomy is the only class I really understand right now. I think I'll change my mind when I get to the head and neck. Biochemistry is always hit or miss. I have never heard someone say phosphorylate, de-phosphorylate, phosphorylase, phosphatase and other similar sounding words in a 10 minute span before. I didn't get much out of it. Immuno was... immuno. I don't think the professor understands how tone can put someone off. The way he speaks to us seems so condescending...

Small group was cool, I like hearing my peers speak so knowledgeably. Makes me feel that I, too, can someday do the same (which I will have to do in about four weeks).

It's always unexpectedly refreshing to hear someone use profanity in an educational setting - especially when we admit that we don't know: "For fuck's sake - you're the doctors." Don't give us so much credit. Actually, we're not... we're pretty useless right now.

Laughter is the best medicine.

Hold on.

Let me just catch my breath.

Today was so productive in all the ways you wouldn't think. I woke up later than usual (thank goodness, I have been meaning to sleep in) to snow-blanketed scenery outside my window. I went downstairs to study on my couch but Wes and Robert came out and were a bit too conversational for being productive. I went upstairs until Robert said he wanted to go to BJs and to run errands. Wesley and I joined him to West Leb. I started to push the cart and jokingly told Robert to hop on the end; the best part: he did. So I pushed him around the aisles until we got to the food. I loved the coffee, ramen, cheesecake, egg nog, berry crumble samples. Good desserts to my vegetables I had for lunch. I bought my bread, veggie burgers, hummus, crackers, apples, and spinach. It was awesome seeing Mike P. when we were checking out! And then we went to Price Chopper where Robert had to pick up some dairy products as Wes and I browsed the magazine racks. After we loaded the car, unloaded the car, and stocked up the fridge/freezer, Robert and I went to the gym! He went into a parallel parking spot, but not in the way you would think. He just rolled up and down the curb haha. It was great. We left after 45 minutes or so (good seeing Nicole and Marco there!)and then when he turned the car around, he just rolled up and down the curb on the opposite side of the street. I just kept on laughing today. We stopped by the math department to get his lunch and then drove home while I read my immunology notes with a terrible British accent. Ahhhhh, such silly times with silly people. :)

"All I want for Christmas is you"

Perfection.

We expect it from ourselves, from each other and certainly from our doctors, but is it obtainable?

Like Dr. O says, p = MD. I'm sure that it is perfectly acceptable to get by. I just feel guilty when I am not studying when I "should be". But at the end of these four years, are we going to remember the nights we kept our heads in the books or the nights bonding over spiked egg nog and hot apple cider in cute outfits? I'm glad Lauren and I went to Julia's for her holiday party. What made it even better? Musical ties, Christmas music, and Sawyer, Devang's dog.

Plus after eating lunch at Yama with Edmund, I bought a white and green striped Dartmouth scarf. I feel like part of the Slytherin house. :P

"You have diabetes. Or down syndrome. Or a broken arm."

Watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V8l8_G_ce_Q
 -courtesy of Yike

It will change your life. 

Today I talked to my mama on my way to school. I like those 15 minutes a few mornings a week to catch up on life and to let her know I am taking care of myself (sorta). Biochemistry moved way fast today and I was a bit tired to pay attention. I skipped immunology for the library and learned some things. I grabbed some pizza before Justin drove me to Alice Peck Day for my preceptorship. I really enjoy working with the physician I shadow and learn from, she's really understanding and tries to include my interests with each day. :)

I took the bus home. Thank you Jocelyn for talking on the phone as I waited for it in the blistering cold. From DHMC, Marco, David and Natsu hopped on so the rest of the ride was easy peasy. Walking home from the Field House dropoff, however, was not. My feet were RED when I got home so I hopped in a warm shower to defrost. I tried to nap after eating (I was ravenous and unsatiable - I figured it was better to just lay down). I got up 30 minutes later without knowing if I fell asleep or not. I am so out of it these days. I can't wait until the weekend when I don't have to do anything but study and sleep and eat.

"You all get that, right?"

We have one professor who is blunt and in your face. Sometimes that is good, but sometimes that just alienates the audience. How can people feel comfortable to ask you questions if the way you talk suggests that they're idiots if they don't know? ANYWAY - I won't be attending those lectures anymore... as in, I won't be going to that lecture TOMORROW.

So today I went to physiology lecture and uploaded the audio recording. After the library, I went to the gym, showered, and then studied. I like it in the cocoon I was in - the silence automatically makes you feel obligated to turn off gchat and study. I got the most done in a long long while. At 4, I headed to the DHMC cafe to get dinner rolls for our anatomy group potluck. At 5, we went to the neuroradiology interest group meeting, but it ran late so I didn't get to catch any of it before going to scrub training. My arms feel SO clean, albeit dry. I got all of the orange stuff off my arms except a few splotches on my FINGER NAILS. Next time, I'll get it. Bijan picked me up and we went into Vermont for dinner. Dan and Christy's home is so lovely with so many Christmas decorations! It was cool to catch up and talk about the most random things over the hosts' pasta with homemade fettuccine sauce, Quynh's amazing salad, Bijan's ice cream and grapes, and ROOT BEER FLOATS.

So... about that studying...

"There is a place where the sidewalk ends

And before the street begins,
And there the grass grows soft and white,
And there the sun burns crimson bright,
And there the moon-bird rests from his flight
To cool in the peppermint wind."
-Shel Silverstein

Camera phone pictures
from my sidewalk journey in NYC,
November 20-23, 2010

empire state building!

all walks of life in the subway car

warren weaver hall done with construction!

liz at wsp

construction at wsp

yogurtland is no more...

where is the v?

i miss urban outfitters so much it hurts.

union square holiday fair

freudian slippers. haha

union square at night

park by bellevue

grand central station

mmmmm

i miss metro crossword puzzles on the subway on my way to work

JAMBA JUICE on w houston

random vs wings along broadway

peeping at people through the stairs in uniqlo, nyc

nyc restaurants get grades. i'm glad mcd passed.

wtc

bobst, the nyu library

living life on the edge

vi where she belongs, in the kitchen! :P

futty playing zoe jane, for zoe jane :)

"The woods are lovely, dark and deep.

But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."
-Robert Frost

Studying is such a chore. Don't get me wrong, I love learning and knowing what we are being taught. It is just so mentally draining, and I get so hungry all. the. time. Anyway, immunology is on my agenda today - let's see what sense I can make out of it.

So I got to thinking about expectations.

The thing is, I admire humility in people. Pride is such a turnoff that I find it hard to be in the same conversation with an arrogant person unless I make light of what they're saying. If I ever do this, I sincerely hope you bring it to my attention.

Expectations are a funny thing. You expect something as if you deserve it. Isn't that also presumptuous and arrogant? I have come to terms with not having any expectations.

Dove Chocolate: You are invited to relax today.

laryngitis.
upper respiratory infection.
the common cold.

I hate being sick. It's been a few days, so I don't think I'm contagious anymore. I hope I am not at least... considering the quantity of people I encountered last night. I'm so glad to see the usual faces like Menaka, Jocelyn, Erin, Ashley, Quynh, Nick, Alex, Lauren, Ryan F, Ryan G, Ken, Yike, Paul, Joe, Derek, Ilya, Mike, Julia, Devang, Nicole, Carrie, Edmund, Chris, Katia, and new ones for me, like Jess - we're rainchecking our coffee date btw, Dave, Wade, Asha, Nora, Libby and others! I'm so glad Elliot stopped by, too! :)

This is in addition to the unquantifiable number of people I met last night from the MALS, math, cs, cog neuroscience depts, DMS2, etc. For me, the party was fun, sadly the DJ bailed and the speakers were feeble. The mixing and mingling seemed cute though; I'm glad everyone met some people outside their usual circle. This morning, I am super tired but impressed by the pristine condition of my house this morning.

In short, my roommates are bomb.

Happy Birthday Rachel!

par·lance[pahr-luhns]–noun

a way or manner of speaking; vernacular; idiom: legal parlance.

I love sitting in lecture and listening to the professor say words like "parlance", which seem so antiquated, but also very lovely at the same time. Of course, these words belong to Dr. J. Lyons. 

There is a certain grace to him. He even taught us about Queen Ann's lace before lecture. The plant is from the parsley family and is also known as wild carrot because its roots smell like carrot. Who doesn't like a little botany before getting into the nitty gritty (today it was the thigh). It is good to know that our professors have lives outside of medicine - someday we will, too. Lab was great, my group is perfectly synced. Dr. Swenson is also an enormous resource who helps us dive into the procedures, full throttle. 

Afterward, Kai, Ryan and I sat together at the rural health meeting, I hope to go someone cool this spring break and shadow and learn. Summer seems so far, but I should start thinking about where to go...


TGIF.

Happy Birthday Jocelyn!

I have a cold.

I think it is due to the fact that I haven't been eating nutritiously or sleeping nearly enough. However, Monday, I still went to the Hanukkah Ball after Margarita's. Tuesday, I stayed in the student lounge and watched Glee with the med school kids. Yesterday, I went to Molly's for Jocelyn's birthday eve. Today, I studied at Dana with some people I don't see enough! I love being able to ask questions with them; it's so open and not judgmental. Speaking of which, I went to the cultural competency events. The sessions were really insightful. Tomorrow, I will be at my house party...

I don't know how I already feel overwhelmed with less than one week of classes. The material has been so dense and detailed, without me having any idea of what is necessary to know. Who has time to study? ...especially since I am achy and tired all the time. These three weeks seem troublesome.

"Things we see are moose accidents, chainsaw accidents... and you see pure medical problems."

As I sit in the emergency medicine core lunch, I am so surprised at this doctor's energy. She is amazingly well-spoken and optimistic. I feel like I am neither of these things at the moment.

Today in our on doc group, everyone was really open and honest. We were in a bubble of openness and warm-fuzzy-feelings. There was such a genuine aura that created a super safe space. It didn't hurt that the cranberry bagel with cream cheese and funfetti cupcake were so delicious. I think it was our best class yet, especially with the addition of Rachel!

Dove dark chocolate wrapper:
"Chocolate won't let you down."